1. As much as possible try to avoid being alone in quiet and less populated places. Now this is a strategy adopted by my younger sister, each time she needs to go out especially at night, she goes with her younger brother. An attacker is more likely to attack a lone victim than two or more people moving together. Strength, they say is in numbers!
2. Make sure your doors are always locked from the inside. Whenever you're dressing up, ensure that your door is locked even if it's a shared apartment and you have a room to yourself, ensure that your door is locked! Believe it or not people have been raped in that vulnerable moment of dressing up or taking off clothes when trousers are halfway down or tops are somewhere over the head with hands caught in them. Such a situation relieves an attacker of the need to tie up as the victims are completely helpless in such a vulnerable position. As soon as your young daughters are old enough to dress up themselves, teach this to them also.
3. From research, it is discovered that a large number of ladies were disvirgined by family members such as cousins, uncles, and in some bizarre cases siblings or even fathers. Step fathers are a much common occurence! A couple of weeks ago I was with a friend who's also a single mother of two. Her first born, a young lady was trying to put a meal together. As she was moving around the room, I noticed she did not even regard that a male stranger was around she was just exhibiting herself all over the place. I felt very uncomfortable and the mother was there without saying anything. I couldn't help but think that this is how step fathers get opportunities to abuse step daughters. The young girls are usually naive and trusting, alas with what we have all over these days, no one can be trusted, apparently not even biological fathers. Mothers need to educate their daughters to always behave decently so that they won't spark the animalistic instincts of some barbaric men. While growing up, we were taught that a lady should always sit with her knees together even if she's on trousers. Call me old fashioned but those principles were developed for a reason.
4. In houses with large families, mothers should teach their girls to always knock on toilet doors before going inside. Knock, push the door open and confirm its free before going inside and lock the door behind you before doing your business. Never rush into a shared toilet. Oh yes, people get raped inside toilets at home too!
5. Parents should also limit releasing their children for extended stay overs, where they cannot fully oversee the welfare of their children personally. No one can take care of a child like the biological parents would.
6. For those with domestic staff, do not allow male staff to bathe, clean up or dress up your daughters no matter how young she is! Couple of momths old babies get raped too, personally I've not been able to wrap my head around this! I can't even comprehend how it works! You don't need to try and understand it either, but just protect those babies please.
7. Parents should always pay attention to strange behavior like, sudden changes in attitude, unusual attraction to opposite sex, sudden withdrawal etc by their children. Listen to them and don't dismiss them when they tell you things. Don't try to be suggestive or put words into their mouth but listen and pay attention to the things they tell you. Amazingly, in a large number of cases of domestic sexual abuse, the mothers are usually aware that something is going on with their daughters and uncles or fathers or step fathers, but they usually dismiss it and keep living in denial even when the daughter complains to them. There are so many reasons for this, of which the most common is because the man in question is usually the breadwinner of the family and the mother feels there's no where else for them to go. This is one of the reasons why ladies who still think they can rely on a man to be their sole provider should have a rethink about being independent!
8. Ladies please get yourself personal defense equipment like, pepper spray, tasers and such. These can prove very effective im fending off an attack.
Paying attention to the steps listed above will give you a very good chance of protecting yourself from rape.
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If you feel that you're at risk of sexual abuse, or you're stuck in an abusive relationship and don't have a way of escape, or if you need counseling or therapy please contact MGBG foundation on Facebook (MGBG Teens and Children Foundation) and Instagram @mgbg_foundation or call 09091607177
